Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
i think im in europe. pls send help
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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