We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
