You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize
