I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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