Where are you?
In a non slutty way
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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