i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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