That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize