If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
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