Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
