is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
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