I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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