"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
