They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
