can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Please, let me fuck your mom
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
