i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
