how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
