Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Randomize
