Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
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