That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Randomize
