Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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