Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Randomize
