this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
