I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
