so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
