you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
