me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize