so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
that may or may not have been my penis.
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