yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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