...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
