Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
