It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Randomize
