girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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