bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
