Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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