you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
