we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
The struggles of a small town man whore
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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