I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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