Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
