That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
