I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
