I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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