But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
