So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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