Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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