I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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