Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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