Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Randomize
