It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
