You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
