you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
He better not be in your backpack
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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